Coffee Lover's Lament
-Kathi Nager
-minor edits by Wyrd Smythe
You can take away my aerosols
And the chemicals in my food;
But if you take away my coffee,
It badly affects my mood!
You can take away the nitrates,
On asbestos put a warning;
But please do not deprive me
Of my coffee in the morning.
You can take away pollution
And red dye number 2;
But if you take away my coffee,
I will fall asleep on you.
You can take away my diet soda
And the steroids in my steak;
But how am I to function
Without a coffee break?
I already stopped adding the saccharine
Cause I thought that was the answer;
But now some scientists from Harvard say
It's the coffee that causes the cancer.
This creates a big dilemma;
I'm not certain what to do.
The only way that it could be worse,
Is if rolls cause cancer, too!
(Personally, I can't stand the stuff!)